Argumentative, abusive brother alienates family
3 minute readPublished: Thursday, December 4, 2025 at 5:00 am
Family Drama: Dealing with an Abusive Brother
A reader has written to Dear Abby seeking advice on how to manage a difficult relationship with her brother. The letter details a pattern of argumentative and abusive behavior that has alienated him from the family.
The writer describes her brother as highly opinionated and confrontational, regardless of the topic. She states that he believes he is the most knowledgeable person in any situation, despite lacking formal education. His communication style is characterized by yelling, screaming, and name-calling. He frequently sends follow-up messages attempting to prove his points.
The writer believes her brother's behavior is abusive and possibly indicative of a mental disorder. She highlights his lack of personal accomplishments. The writer and her husband have successful careers. She explains that even when she attempts to remain silent, her brother provokes her to elicit a reaction. The situation has escalated to the point where other family members avoid him.
The writer seeks a solution to make their interactions more civil. Dear Abby's response is direct, advising the writer that there is no easy fix for her brother's behavior. The advice emphasizes the futility of trying to change him and suggests limiting contact to protect her own well-being.
BNN's Perspective:
This situation highlights the complexities of family dynamics and the challenges of dealing with difficult personalities. While the letter writer's frustration is understandable, it's important to recognize the limitations of our ability to change others. The advice to prioritize one's own mental health and set boundaries is sound. It underscores the importance of self-preservation in the face of potentially toxic relationships.
Keywords: family conflict, abusive behavior, sibling rivalry, mental health, communication, boundaries, Dear Abby, relationship advice, family drama, conflict resolution